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> Real life headlines imitate The Onion's
akaCG
post Jun 28 2012, 01:06 AM
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First:

For those among us who are not familiar with The Onion, please familiarize yourself with it before you "play" in this thread:

Here's the Wiki article: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_onion

And here's their website: http://www.theonion.com/

Second:

The purpose of this thread is for all of us to have lots of fun by posting hyperlinked real-life HEADLINES (and only headlines; i.e. no quoted excerpts and stuff) of real-life NEWS articles (not editorial/opinion/commentary/blog pieces) that are so absurd/ridiculous/uproariously humorous/etc. that they could have just as easily come from The Onion.

Third:

The subject matter of the articles/stories need not be related to politics, btw, although I wouldn't be surprised if it turns that most of them are. Kinda natural, what with this being a political debate site and all.

OK. Having taken care of the not-so-fun procedural stuff, let me start things off with ...

"Poll gives Obama edge over Romney on alien invasion"



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akaCG
post Mar 23 2017, 02:50 AM
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"Copley veteran turns 100 Credits dance, olive oil and nightly vodka for long life"

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AuthorMusician
post Mar 23 2017, 04:47 AM
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Former Colorado GOP chairman Steven Curtis charged with voter fraud
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akaCG
post Mar 23 2017, 03:09 PM
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"Students Around The Country Are Sending Letters To Trump Via A Large Vagina Sculpture"

EDITED TO ADD ...

... a headline that, just like the one quoted just above, also meets the overall Onion-like headline requirements that were outlined in the OP of this thread, and one that is largely juxtapositional to the one above:

"Staring at boobs may give a boost to male lifespans"


laugh.gif

This post has been edited by akaCG: Mar 24 2017, 12:04 AM
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akaCG
post Mar 25 2017, 05:27 PM
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"These Reality TV Contestants Survived The Wilderness & Found Out Their Show Was Canceled"

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AuthorMusician
post Apr 1 2017, 12:23 PM
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Without Obama, once-booming gun industry poised to shrink
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Mrs. Pigpen
post Apr 26 2017, 12:43 PM
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]Saudi Arabia elected to UN women's rights commission

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AuthorMusician
post Apr 28 2017, 01:39 PM
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Trump says he thought being president would be easier than his old life
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akaCG
post May 12 2017, 12:34 PM
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"President gets 2 scoops of ice cream, everyone else 1"

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Bikerdad
post May 23 2017, 04:01 AM
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When scientists saw the mouse heads glowing, they knew the discovery was big
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akaCG
post May 31 2017, 01:07 PM
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"Squatty Potty dumps Kathy Griffin after photo with decapitated Trump head"

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akaCG
post Jun 16 2017, 11:22 AM
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"These parents are asking their babies for consent to pick them up"

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Mrs. Pigpen
post Jun 24 2017, 06:05 PM
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North Korea Proves Your White Male Privilege Is Not Universal

Thought it belonged here.
I'm sure all the nK citizens dying in prison camps will be happy to know they have "white privilege" too.
Perhaps la Sha(t) is hoping for a date with Dennis Rodman.

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akaCG
post Jun 29 2017, 01:57 PM
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"Self-driving cars are totally perplexed by kangaroos"

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akaCG
post Jul 1 2017, 09:15 AM
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"Macron's 'complex thoughts' too much for Bastille Day press conference"

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Bikerdad
post Jul 8 2017, 07:59 AM
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Are goats taking jobs from union workers?

A battle is brewing at Western Michigan University this summer between a group of hungry goats and a labor union.

The 400-member American Federation of State, County and Municipal Employees has filed a grievance contending that the work the goats are doing in a wooded lot is taking away jobs from laid-off union workers.
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Curmudgeon
post Oct 18 2017, 06:34 PM
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ANONYMOUS WARNS WORLD TO 'PREPARE' FOR WORLD WAR 3
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Curmudgeon
post Mar 13 2018, 04:52 AM
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Trump Just Announced He Is Done Working And Will Now Coast The Rest Of His Term
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Curmudgeon
post May 5 2018, 06:42 PM
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Giuliani: Despite Stormy Daniels Fumble Trump Still 'Loves Me' (link)

Apparently Michail Cohen is no longer keeping Donald's affairs out of the headlines...
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Trouble
post May 13 2018, 03:21 PM
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Kansas Police No Longer Allowed to Have Sex With People They Pull Over blink.gif
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