Boy, can I relate to this thread. My neighbor also happens to be my landlord (I live in what is charmingly referred to as a "mother-in-law house"), and he fancies himself quite the handyman - NOT!! The house has no gutters on the outside so when it rains like this, I get a nice waterfall down the back of my neck, bad plumbing, the thermostat is falling off the wall, no baseboards, antique linoleum in the kitchen that is pitted and buckling, kitchen cupboards with so many layers of paint they won't close, windows that don't open, windows that won't
stay open, big gaps under both front and back doors (thank goodness I live in CA where it doesn't get freezing cold), etc. etc. ad nauseum, BUT his "handiness" only extends to things he
wants to do, like planting crap everywhere out front, including some kind of wild garlic that stinks to high heaven, and telling me to take care of it, extending his back fence into my already tiny back yard, painting 3/4 of the house yellow with puke green trim (goes really well with the red brick steps

), which took him 9 months BTW (he painted the whole house with a brush), staining half the back fence barn red, putting a brick pad in the back yard without leveling or sealing it (the grass growing between the cracks makes a lovely checkerboard pattern), and too many other stupid things to mention. His incompetence, plus his constant presence (once under my bathroom window while I was, ahem, "indisposed") drives me to distraction. If you ask, why don't you move, I would but having 3 animals makes it damn difficult to find a rental that will accept me, and I refuse to give up my animals.
Oh, and people who let their dogs poop on my lawn and don't pick it up, and the kids who throw their trash in my hedges.
BoF, maybe
Ol Sarge is suggesting billing the neighbor 5 bucks?