Okay, I pulled this quote from HeatherRob from the NAMBLA and the age of consent thread:





So...the focus of this thread is sexuality in America & sexuality in American media.

1. Do you think that we are a "sex-crazed" society, and what are the positive or negative effects associated with that? / Do you think that we are too sexually inhibited, and what are the positive or negative effects associated with that?

2. What role does the media play as far as sexuality in America is concerned? Positive and negative effects.

Please remember that there are minors on the site.

To question 1:
I don't think America is sex crazed at all. They can't even show somebody's rear-end on TV in this country without a huge uproar. What is considered risque in this country is merely laughable in many other places on Earth.

I definitely think people in the US are too puritanical in their views about sex. The negative effects are a lack of education about making responsible choices, and using contraception properly. 13% of pregnancies in the US result from teen sexual activity. This number could be drastically lowered if we'd end this denial about teen sexuality, and start teaching them how to take care of themselves, and protect their own interests and bodies.

As to question 2:
The mass media is so censored, about the most activity you'll ever see is a kiss, anyway. Once in a blue moon you might see someone naked with black spots covering their "naughty areas", usually begetting a great public outcry for "decency". Certain religions, I feel, play a much larger role in frightening people to death about the natural functions of their own bodies. They brainwash people into thinking their whole world will be wiped out by a massive fireball if they so much as have an impure thought, as demonstrated by HeatherRob, whom you quoted in your post.

Sex is a completely natural function of the human body... It is nothing to be frowned upon, or ashamed of, at all.

I don't think that any one society/culture has the goods on being 'sex crazed.' Some just hide it better than others.

Let's take the Taliban for instance.....in the name of religion they forced women to veil completely, they couldn't speak when in public, couldn't laugh, weren't allowed to wear shoes that made any sound, couldn't leave their homes without being accompanied by a male relative, etc. The men of the Taliban said that all these things reminded men of the presence of women and therefore sex.

Now if that isn't sex crazed I don't know what is.

In other societies where overt sexual activity is repressed people find other outlets. Like the Saudi men who go to SE Asia or Egypt on 'sex vacations.' This has become quite a problem because in these places they are contracting STD's and bringing them back to their wives.

So, this you can suppress and/or repress all you want, but it's there, it's there.

What I do think the media has fostered in this country is a lack of respect for moral decency. Those who chose a path they consider decent and/or voice their concerns are derided and considered nerdly. Ask Dan Quail. He was pilloried for his opinion.

1. Yes i do. But that's what makes America great!!

2. Sex is everywhere in American society: Ads, magazine covers, TV shows, MOVIES, etc.

In my Sociology class, we watched a video from some lady who said that commercials on TV basically use sexy women as "models" for their products, even when the woman has NO relation to the product being advertised.

She also said that these ads sometimes encourgae sexual assault because of some of the "provocative" poses & etc.

If, by this, you mean obsessed with sex, yes - but not in a healthy or liberating way. I see no positive effects of our unhealthy obsesion with sex. The chief negative effect is that as a national we are sexually and emotionally stunted as a result. We simply cannot, as a society, approach sex as adults. We behave like a nation on misinformed, terrified virgins, afraid of our own bodies.

WAY too sexually inhibited. The US is probably the most repressed society in the West. The most obvious negative effect is widespread - widespread - ignorance about sex and sexuality. This not only contributes to the level of STDs and unwanted pregnancies, but I would suggest that it is also directly responsible for the number of sex crimes in this country - and, of course, our terror of the human body. As a sort of bonus, we're a laughing stock to countries which actually have a sane approach to sex - which wouldn't really bother me if I thought our attitudes toward sex were in any way constructive or productive. They're not. They are stupid, retrograde, and very destructive.

It generally serves to reinforce our ignorance. When sex is not being censored altogether, it is merely being exploited for commerce. For the negative effects, see above; for the positive effects, dream on...

Wertz writes:

I agree.

Sexuality is encouraged by American culture in only disparaging ways. Rarely depicted as being a healthy way of expressing love, sex is commonly depicted as being dirty - and associated with anger and violence.

American culture is warped, the disorder is widespread, and there's likely no going back.

Throughout American history, sex has been considered wrong and unnatural; the sexual revolution of the 1960's was short-lived. This positive connotations associated with sexuality in the 60's has vanished steadily - as sex became associated with drug use and disease. STD's and AIDS are not always viewed by our society as being "health problems" - but as punishments for behaving "indecently".

Discouraging multiple sex partners because it may be emotionally or physically damaging is one thing, and likely the best thing - . But discouraging it because it is morally wrong sends an entirely different message.

The natural sex impulse is positive in nature and should be valued as such.

Ok. I'm off my soap box.

jjirout

It blows (no pun intended ) my mind how messed up we are about sex. On the one hand, sex sells just about everything in this country, from cars, to cigarettes, to office supplies. On the other hand, movies get a PG rating and show violent death all the time, while sex or nudity gets an "R" pretty quickly.

It's schizophrenic. We are saying, through advertising etc., that it's all about sex, and yet, we are also saying sex is bad or taboo. INSANE!

We are encouraged to dress up teenage girls like little sex goddesses, and then teach them abstinence is the only way. AAArgh.

I tend to agree with most of the things that have been said so far in this thread.

I think that America is simultaneously "sex-crazed" and sexually inhibited. We are flooded with images of sexuality everyday. We use them to sell products. They exist within the realm of entertainment media, and yet we still view sexuality as being dirty or forbidden. The message is confusing, and sexual education is lacking. It is a very immature attitude towards sex.

This effects both genders, but I think that it particularly effects women, because a woman who accepts the sexual side of her nature and acts on it is branded by society in a negative manner, whereas men, particularly heterosexual men, don't see that as much. They seem to be encouraged by the media to explore their sexuality while women are being fed mixed messages. I could be wrong, but that is how it appears to me.

Sexuality is natural, and in my opinion, people should explore their own sexuality, regardless of gender, in a responsible and educated manner.

I guess I am missing something. I don't see how we are that different from other countries.

Let's take the Netherlands for instance in which, as I understand it, prostitution is legal and accepted. But I bet if you were to privately poll the middle class (probably the bulk of the people) they would not want their daughters in prostitution. They would probably want to see their children grow up, get married and have children.

This is very true in Hispanic countries too - they have very strict concepts of morality, especially for women.

So, what country would you propose has the right attitude towards sexuality?

I haven't a clue as to what country or culture has the right attitude about sex. I just know this one isn't doing very well.

Tour around the neighborhoods near any military installation. There you will find the accepted camp-follower trades (strip clubs, massage parlors, escort services). As always, you sin Saturday night and pray for forgiveness Sunday morning.

A local up-coming Republican politico was busted a while back for trying to seduce a 13-year-old girl he met on the Internet. He's in the jailhouse now.

I once lived with a woman who'd been molested by her dad at a young age. Her dad was a vice-president of a major automotive firm and a WWII vet.

We had predatory priests in the church of my youth. The altar boys were always nervous.

There was no "sexual revolution" and no "women's liberation" as far as I can tell. Things are worse now than before. Women are more exploited and the sex trades flourish more than ever within the walls of "conservative America".

I'm not sure there is a solution. Sex for hire is the oldest profession for a reason, and that reason is built into biology.

God has one heckuva sense of humor, or is just plain crazy.

The French for example. They have affairs and sexual deviants... but they also have a culture supports healthy sexual experiences. Teenagers expressing their love physically might be smiled at, and - if the family likes the boy or girl, perhaps even though of tenderly by the parents. In America, this couple would likely be shunned and frowned upon.

And the Italians too. They set parameters, but they also accept the complete absense of parameters. Families do not accept the notion of free sex- parameter - but if your engaged or married - they are all support - all parameters are gone and sex gets an enthusiastic thumbs up.

Does sex ever get an enthusiastic thumbs up in America?

jjirout

Heheh I don't think thats my thumb..LOL


Darcaine

I dont usually enter into a debate on this kind of issue, but I have some questions.

First I will address the questions Cyan presented.



Personally, I dont think we(Americans) are anymore sex-crazed than anyone else. I think in the hollywood or MTV sense of sexuality it has gotten perverted to the point where women become objects instead of people, etc. Other than that I think American sexuality is and has progressed pretty far. It is both positive and negative, its very hard to discern being this is very gray, and encompasses morals or religion no matter how one looks at it. Its just that kind of subject.



IMO It plays a enormous role. Hollywood dictates a lot of what is done in our society. In a large sense I believe they dictate a swig or two of the american sexual identity. The media and her riders have changed how we view certain aspects of sexuality and sexual practices. These changes have set, imo, a different standard to which we view certain sexual practices or perversions as some would put it. This is for the most part negative in my opinion.

Now before I am riddled with holes let me clarify. I am not saying that the repressive old catholic (example) standard of sexual hipocrisy is something we should return to, but...I believe we have gone too far away from where we should be.

Now for my questions.

Stefan Fargus-


I agree and understand that there is a need for sexual education in order for responsible choices to be made.

I disagree that Americans are in anyway puritanical about sex anymore. This is in no way an attack on your age, but this is not the 1950's anymore.
Most Americans are very open about it all. Where is the puritanism? (not a rhetorical, but serious question.) It a given that the old grandmas are going to be tense about it , but other than that who is?

Wertz-




I'm not attacking you either, but where is this true in our society? Where and how are we so ignorant of sex?

Jirout-




Maybe it was depicted this way in the past...but I dont see that it is anymore. I dont know how it is among adults, but among my teenage peers its all about fun and pleasure and a LOT of them have casual sex.
I see no sexual inhibitions at all....

Cyan-


I guess i havent caught it yet. Where is sex being portrayed as dirty or forbidden? I get the opposite message, just do it, its fun, everyone is doing it. Its the 1# conversation topic among guys I know... I dont know anyone who sees it as any bit dirty but as rather the opposite.


Wondering.....

Travis

Travis - Men's sexuality in society has always differed from women's - men's sexuality is still encouraged - but is it not encouraged as an expression of love. The "fun everybody's doing it" attitude is, in my opinion, not what good sex is about. Where is the romance? Viewing sex as a sport may not be "dirty" in nature, but it is cheapening it. The "just do it, it's fun" lifestyle is ugly because sex is not associated with love at all, and this is typically American.

Our bodies are manifestations of ourselves, and the organsm ! is intensely personal. Throwing it around cheapens it.

You just can't do it right when your doing it with everyone - because there's no relationship there.

It sounds like your peers are just playing the game - who can get the most - and likely leaving a number of unresponsive girls unresponsive...

jjirout


Darcaine - I guess I set myself up for that... butt no, I was not insinuating. jjirout

Thanks, I understand this, and I see the difference and disagree with this type of sexuality.

Maybe I didnt articulate my overall question well enough. I meant, where is this widespread sexual repression/ignorance that was spoken of in nearly every post?

Or are you saying that, in a sense, that this casual sex culture is repressive?



I still dont see Americans as sexually inhibited at all.

That is precisely what I meant.

Casual sex is repressive - the opportunity to explore one's potential is severely limited. Passion reaches heights when it is mutally shared. When your partner's excitement becomes your own - sexual energy increases. This can be a profound experience - and - rather than emphasizing the magic of this, rather than embracing sexuality as a healthy lifestyle between two lovers - American culture supports cheap flings - meant to "get rid of the urge" and sex, which has the potential to unite two people, is understood as something to be done and discarded. This is ignorance.

But for women it is altogether different.



Women are still sexually inhibited. "Good" girls have traditionally been understood as the type you marry, and "bad" girls as the type you bed. I believe that this belief system (although damaging) is still prevalent - (however, good girls might now be the type that sometimes let guys have their way).

But enjoyment is another matter.

I can't speak for all women. But... I'll get to the heart of the matter...

I'll put this gently... men are encouraged to express themselves physically. Pornography (that mostly appeals to men) is everywhere - upon a boy's maturation, masturbation is accepted. Sexuality is usually dealt with directly. But for women... there are unpleasant associations to sex like periods and pregnancy, and the moral implications to these associations have an impact on a women's sexual life. Also, things may not be as clear. Reaching orgasm may not be... just a simple matter of movement and - to complicate things more - a woman's sexual drive may not reach it's peak until her thirties.

A relationship is all important. It allows for communication between the couple, helps a women overcome whatever physical or moral implications that may intrude upon her sense of freedom, and hopefully provides security and intimacy in the form of foreplay.

Women cannot help but be inhibited.

Without an emphasis on love and relationships, sexuality becomes over-rated and under-enjoyed.

Is that a word?

jjirout

america is usually sexually repressed, I remember last year when NBC get some attractive playboy playmates to do some risky stuff the christian taleban went nuts say things like women should prevent thier husbands from watching this, mothers should prevent thier sons from watching this even though the girls were not nude. they refer to attractive sexually liberated women as whores and sluts while ignore body mutilations like piercing and tatooing(which turns me off). the channel E which has this program called wild on cover womens' breasts which implies that women should be ashamed of thier breasts. other channels also do that kind of thing while showing off self hating tattoo and piercing freaks